Lustige Lügen, die Eltern ihren Kindern erzählen

Als Kinderloser kann ich mir nur vorstellen, wie oft man seinen Nachwuchs anschwindelt, weil die harte Realität zu hart oder komplex oder schlichtweg viel zu lange dauern würde. Also greift man halt schon einmal zur kleinen Notlüge. Das kann auch verdammt charmant und liebevoll ausfallen, wie diese Beispiele, die auf Reddit geteilt wurden.

Eigentlich verlinke ich solche Zitatansammlungen meist in den Kleinigkeiten, hier kann ich aber nicht anders, als euch zumindest ein paar Highlights zu zeigen. Da sind einfach zu goldige bei!

„I was told that every person gets 10,000 words per month. If you reach the limit, you can’t physically speak until the new month begins. Anytime I was especially talkative, Dad would say, ‚Careful now, I have to think you are up over 9,000 by now.‘ That would shut me right up.“ (Toastwaver)

„My dad said if I could look after a special growing rock, and watered it each day until it stopped growing I could get a dog. I’d water it and every week, while I was at school he’d replace it with a slightly bigger rock.“ (AppleChiaki)

„Parents used to tell my only brother and I that we used to have another brother who turned into a mushroom from not taking a bath. Even added him to the family albums.“
(Abacazam)

„We got our daughter to eat fish by calling it ‚Argentinian Chicken‘. That worked for a long time until grandma came along and f*cked it up.“ (effthegreen)

„I’ve always been pretty fascinated with space. When I was a little girl, my dad would take his ladder and put it on our lawn every night, and bring my outside to tell me he put the moon up for me. I believed him for years. He passed away a few years ago,and every night when I see the moon I think of him.“

„My grandpa told me, when driving on the highway, that the fastest way to count all of the cows in a field is to count all the legs, and then divide by 4. It took me many, many years to figure out that my grandpa was a huge troll.“ (yellowfish04)

„My mother was a genius: She told us that brown M&M’S were only for adults, so whenever we encountered a brown M&M we would give it to her.“ (Sarah Tardif)

„When she was small, I told my daughter that when she lied a red spot would appear on the middle of her forehead. I knew for sure it worked when she did indeed lie and then her hand went up to cover her forehead.“ (OwlPoop)

„My dad always told me, that if I press a certain button on our remote control our tv would explode. As I grew older, I was curious and pressed said button only to see he saved porn channels on this one“ (lisasavestheworld)

„They don’t sell replacement batteries for that toy.“

via: boredpanda